In a few hours we will be heading out to attend the funeral of our neighbor Sandy. For well over a year now she has been struggling with her health after a series of mini strokes and a few falls. When we moved into this house over ten years ago, Sandy and her husband Russ were always kind, loving, and generous to us. At that time, they were already both retired and we were a young family of six, with lots of noise, life, and animals. We could see that most of the people in our neighborhood were all about the same age. They all bought lots from the developer at the same time and became pretty good friends. We seemed to be the first of the “next generation” to move in, following the divorce of our homes previous owners. For a time, we had a small “hobby farm” with a couple cows, chickens, ducks, rabbits, sheep, donkeys, turkeys, and, of course, dogs. We didn’t have all these at the same time, but we had enough so that everyone in the neighborhood knew us as the place with the animals.
Anyway, Russ would walk over to visit when he saw us out. He seemed to like to see what was happening at our place and with us. He helped with a few projects here and there and was always happy to stop and talk, the way people used to. Sometimes we would go over to their house and sit and visit, and sometimes the kids sneak over to beg for some cookies and to sit on their deck with them. They loved seeing our children and were happy to give them treats. But as we all know, nothing lasts forever. About seven years ago now, Russ started to feel more tired than usual. One Saturday I went over and talked with him for quite some time, first about a woodchuck problem, then about us, and then about his feeling more tired than usual. I told him that I could help with the yard work. He made an appointment to see a doctor about this fatigue later that same week. A few days later, after his appointment, I called him to see what the doctor had said. Sandy answered his phone and immediately burst into tears. She told me that the doctors found extensive cancer throughout his body. This was my first real experience talking to someone at such a difficult time. I was basically speechless, but did say that we were sorry, that we would be praying, and that we would take care of the yard work for her.
The doctor sent Russ home with only a few weeks to live. Hospice care was called, and we tried to visit, but Russ said that he didn’t want us to see him because he didn’t want to be remembered that way. At the end of the same week, I was mowing their lawn and Sandy came out to talk to me. Russ heard the mower and sent her out to warn me about a small stump in the yard. Even in that condition, he still was “looking out” for us. I again told her that she didn’t need to worry about the yard work and to tell Russ that we appreciated him and that we would continue to look after the yard for them. The following Sunday, ten days after his diagnosis, Russ passed away. I never dreamed that our last conversation would have been there on the porch swing, but I have always been thankful that I took the time just to sit and talk. For the past seven years we have faithfully mowed their three acres and helped out with other miscellaneous yard work. We will continue to do so for their son until he no longer needs us. They have always allowed us to stay at their cabin “up north” for our anniversary get away, but we were never trading favors or keeping score. They offered it to be a blessing to us just as we mow to be a blessing to them. We don’t do it because of a commitment to a promise. We do it because of a commitment to a person, a neighbor, and friends.
Time keeps on ticking by, and our neighborhood continues to change. We saw another man across the street get his dream car, but then a few years later we also picked up empty bags for his feeding tube that fell out of their trash can, and then we saw that dream car sold. Now a younger family than us lives in that house, and they have more animals than we had! We watched the “walkers” go up and down the street, first as a couples with a dog, then without the dog or one of the spouses. In time the remaining spouse stops walking, their possessions get sold off in an estate sale, and their house gets sold. Next a younger couple moves in, and the “old walkers” are replaced by kids on bikes. New walkers appear on the street and the cycle of time in the neighborhood begins again.
Wow! What a grim post! I’ll make this one simple final point in conclusion. DO NOT TAKE TODAY FOR GRANTED. We so easily live in the illusion that things will “stay this way forever,” BUT THEY WON’T. In fact, change is always coming and it’s the most consistent thing in life! A medical diagnosis, fall, car accident, or even a simple bite of a brownie could be all that it takes to turn your life upside down, in an instant. Again, do not take today for granted because change is the most consistent thing in life!
We are blessed
Hannah Helps Blog 