By Janean
Our story is unique to us. There are many families who have been hit with similar tragedies, and their story is unique to them. What we write is based on our events and our reactions, in hopes that others may take something from our story and add comfort and strength to their story. I’ve struggled with sharing a topic that’s been on my heart, because I am worried that people will not understand since it goes against our natural human response when tragedies happen. When bad things happen to people, the first thing they do is point fingers and desire to blame someone else for the mishap.
Let’s take a moment and look back at how we got here here. It all began with a special meeting for girls at Hannah’s college. Hannah didn’t attend the meeting, but one of her friends did. As a special treat, someone made some brownies to share with the girls that came. However, due to gluten restrictions, the brownies were made from a mix that unfortunately contained refined peanut flour. Hannah’s friend was not aware of the fact that there were peanut products in these brownies, and she decided to take one to Hannah later that night because she knew how much Hannah loved brownies. I want to point out, very STRONGLY, that neither one of these two people had any intention of harming Hannah. The person who made the brownies did not make them for Hannah. Hannah was not part of this meeting. This person didn’t even know that Hannah was allergic to peanuts, and she didn’t know that Hannah’s friend took a brownie for her. The friend who gave Hannah the brownie was only thinking of being kind to her, especially since it was the day after her birthday. With both of these two, they were only trying to do something special and good for someone they loved.
Over the past eight months, we’ve met some people who immediately want to blame these two for the result of this tragedy. Further, some people cannot understand how and why we are not angry or upset with them. They seem to think that we should demand some kind of recompense for our loss. With each encounter, after a thorough explanation of what happened, they can also see that sometimes accidents do just happen. For me, it’s heartbreaking to know that God had to use these two sisters in Christ to carry out His plan. These two women are God fearing, caring, giving, prayer warriors, and true pictures of what friends should be.
One of the hardest things we endured was when the time came to tell these two women what had happened. While we were in the Watertown hospital, waiting for the doctors to figure out why Hannah’s blood oxygen level would not go up, Hannah’s friend started texting me to find out what happened to Hannah and how she was doing. We thought it was best for her parents to break the news to her, because they probably knew how to do it better than we could. So, Dave called her friend’s mom and explained the situation. Later that week, this friend wrote Hannah a beautiful letter and she desired to come read it to Hannah when we were at Froedtert. We were happy to have her come because we felt this would help her find some closure and start healing.
The day after we came to Froedtert, the doctors wanted to know exactly what was in the brownies that Hannah ate. I had to call the woman who made the brownies. Crazy as it was, when I called, she and her husband just arrived at the hospital to visit with us and to see Hannah. When I asked her what was in the brownies, she didn’t know why I was asking about that because Hannah didn’t even go to the girls’ meeting. I told her that a brownie was taken to Hannah. The woman became distraught when she realized the reality of the situation.
Weeks after things settled down and we struggled to find our new “normal,” we took the step to reach out to both these women. We thought that it was necessary to assure them that we forgive them and that we wish no ill will on them. Sadly, anytime we meet, this event will always be in all our minds and in each of our hearts. But with the Lord’s help, we can show them His love, care, and forgiveness through both our speech and our actions. We have accepted that this was the will of God, and we can clearly see that there was nothing but good intentions that led to her taking that one tragic bite.
Romans 12:17 says, “Recompense to no man evil for evil.” Which means when something is done that harms you, especially if it wasn’t intentional, do not return harm to the person. Later on in the same chapter, verse 21 says, “Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.” This concept is so backward in this day and age. People say, “Well, they did this to me, I’m going to do this to them!!” Matthew 22 tells us that a lawyer came to Jesus and asked Him what the greatest commandment is. We see in verse 37 that Jesus answered him, “thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment.” Then Jesus went on to name the second greatest commandment in verse 39 which He said, “And the second is like unto it, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”
Who is your neighbor? Anyone around you! No matter who they are, what they look like, smell like, talk like, think like, act like, or what they have done to you, God commands us to love them. This is not natural nor is it easy, but if we follow that first commandment, love God with ALL our heart, with ALL our soul, and with ALL our mind, He can help us bring goodness to those around us.
We are blessed.
Hannah Helps 